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My Favorite Things

  • Naptime
  • Caffeine in various forms
  • Italy
  • The Beach
  • Family camping trips
  • The gym
  • Storytime at the Library
  • Rachael Ray
  • Running

Wednesday, October 5, 2011

Open Letter to the Lady Behind Me on the Plane

Dear Lady sitting Behind Me On the Plane,

Hey there. You probably remember me. I was the one with the two little girls, who I find delightful and you apparently find detestable. I'm going to go ahead and assume you have no kids (and if you do, I feel very, very sorry for them) so I'll enlighten you a little on 2 year olds. 2 year olds dislike sitting still for a long period of time, particularly if the sitting involves being strapped into a seat between her parents with the seat in front of her lowered into her lap. When 2 year olds are forced to do something they don't want to do for a long period of time, generally they get, um, loud to louder.

Here's what went down. The plane landed. Captain Destructo was super psyched to finally get out of her seat. However, as is typical with bizarro plane rules, it's okay to get out of your seat 30,000 feet above the air while traveling 900 mph, but not okay to get out when you are on a runway sitting still. Captain Destructo was not happy, and starting singing. That's right. Her ABCs in fact. But you, lady behind me, apparently dislike the ABCs very, very much. I will admit that hearing the song 3 times in a row got a little old, but we could have done without your "stop already!" And yes, we all heard you. You were about as subtle as Captain Destructo when she yelled "someone's stinky!" about an hour earlier. We also heard your loud sighs of exasperation.

So, because I am concerned about my fellow passengers, I told her to stop singing. She cried. Even louder than the singing. We didn't attempt to stop the crying. I hope you liked that better.

Proud Mommy of future Grammy winner


  1. Amazing. We took our two kids on their first airplane ride from Ontario, CA to San Fran about 2 years ago. we had a 1 1/2 year old and a 2 1/2 year old. They did amazing on the flight up HOWEVER on the flight back home they blocked us in and took us out on the runway. Well there we set fora about 1/2 hour. NO moving, no flying. Within that time our littest was getting ancy. She started talking very LOUDLY and as I was trying to ease her into one of her books and games the lady behind us YELLED can you feed her to make her shut up?? Really!!! I turned and told her as nice as I could that I wasn't going to feed her the entire flight to make her happy. The plane wasn't moving and to top it off I was getting items out. She barely even started getting loud. People are rude!!!

  2. I had an experience when my son was 6 months. We were in flight - he'd been fed, napped and was just plain getting irritable! He was fussing (not screaming) when the lady behind me PUSHES her call button for the stewardess. When she arrives, she asks for her to tell me "To put a pacifier, bottle, or something in my kids mouth!" Like I hadn't thought of that already!! But he wasn't hungry and he never took a pacifier! The stewardess was great and never said anything to me (I had heard it all anyway, since I was RIGHT in front of her) and later in the flight consoled me as he continued to be fussy! I hate flying because of people just like this!!

  3. I thought of your post while we were flying from New Orleans to Atlanta last weekend. A mom and dad had their twins on the plane, but didn't get them their own seats and had to sit separately with the kids on their laps. The flight was overbooked so there were no assigned seats. Anyway, I'm not sure how old the twins were, but they were definitely walkers and talkers. I think at least the little girl might have some wort of developmental delay b/c the way she was crying was more like a very young baby. She screamed while the plane was taxing (taxi-ing?) and during take off and landing, but was fine during the fight. Also, the mom had to sit in the middle seat between strangers b/c some old lady insisted on sitting in the aisle. I could hear people around us sighing, but thankfully no one said anything. If they had, I would have said something to THEM. I felt so bad for the mom. By the time I realized I should swap seats with the old lady, we had already been told not to get up.

  4. Our daughter was 7mos when she flew to Paris. Much to our surprise, our perpetual motion machine (PMM) was the most lovely pleasant joy of a child I have ever seen on a plane. But the kid to our left and the kid to our right took turns screaming the entire time. At arrival, i cannot begin to describe the dirty looks we got from EVERYONE when they saw us packing up our baby. I can, however, describe the very lovely gentleman who thought it was appropriate to explain how we had ruined his trip and shouldn't be taking a baby on a plane because of the inconvenience to other passengers - he was a big, rude, out of line jerk, and I wish PMM had screamed the whole transatlantic way just to make him more uncomfortable.