Total Pageviews

My Favorite Things

  • Naptime
  • Caffeine in various forms
  • Italy
  • The Beach
  • Family camping trips
  • The gym
  • Storytime at the Library
  • Rachael Ray
  • Running

Monday, May 5, 2014

I Just Wish I Could Be With You All the Time

I sniffled and surreptiously wiped away tears last night,not for the first time that day. "Are you crying?" my husband asked. I shook my head no, determined not to let him know that Toy Story 3 had again reminded me of sending Captain Destructo to kindergarten.

Have you seen Toy Story 3 yet? If not I'll summarize it for you. Stupid Andy grows up and leaves his sweet, beloved mother behind while he goes off to college (it's possible that other things happen involving the toys but that was my takeaway). At the end of the movie, Andy and his mom walk into his empty room and look around. "Oh, Andy," his mom says, crying "I just wish I could be with you all the time."

That line pretty much sums up my feelings on the upcoming school year, when Captain Destructo will officially not be with me all the time and will go to kindergarten. The state of Texas hates mothers and so insists that 5 year olds attend full day kindergarten. I have tried everything I can think of to avoid this. Just this past week, I was determined to homeschool her to avoid sending her away. I have considered keeping her home an extra year. I have hoped that we would move to another state that allows part time kindergarten. If there was a way to avoid this that didn't involve wrapping her in 5 year old size Baby Bjorn and carrying her with me everywhere I go I have researched it.

In case you wondered, yes, I do realize I am being overly dramatic about kindergarten. Friends, I was a public school teacher. I used to laugh at parents like me, back when I was a cocky 23 year old with no children of my own. As a teacher, I saw how happy the students were in school and how much fun they had. In my 4 years of teaching, I think maybe once or twice did a kid cry that they missed their moms. Yet I still can't wrap my brain around MY daughter being in school 6 hours a day, 5 days a week. My list of fears includes, but is not limited to, the following:
-what if someone is mean to her?
-what if she gets lost trying to find her classroom?
-what if she can't get her yogurt open at lunch and no one helps her?
-what if she is sad or sick and misses me and I'm not there to make her feel better?

And then there are other, bigger fears too big to be named that I'm sure every other parent has had to think of, given recent events in schools in our country.

I'm trying to focus on positives, such as spending more one on one time with New Baby (who is actually 3 and not a baby). It's occurring to me that she may need some attention. She may or may not be still potty training. And it's possible that she needs to work on some skills that I mastered with Captain Destructo....New Baby counted yesterday and it went like this: "1, 2, 3, 5, 8, 10, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1." Oops. And as my husband pointed out while staring at disgust at the dust accumulated on the fan blades, I'll "have more time to clean next year."

So help me. Have you sent your kids to kindergarten? Were they ok? Were you ok? How did everyone cope?


  1. Yep, been there, done that...twice. When I sent my older 2 to school, I cried a lot, even though I said I wouldn't. The younger siblings cried, too. But not only that, my wee kindergarteners spent that year exhausted. It just seems too long of a day for kinders! I was beyond excited the day my third child started Summit, because he's had so much more free time this year, even though he's learned everything his brothers learned going to full time school. He can still nap if he wants (on the non-Summit days) or just play and use his imagination. I just regret not switching sooner, making my older ones endure those long days.

  2. I loved this post! Q started all day school at 4 years old because we were stationed in England. I was so torn because I didn't know if I should keep her home for the year as I had expected to if we were in the States and then send her to the American school on base, or send her to the British school that was a 7 minute walk from our house. In the end, God blessed us all as it worked out that she went to school while I tried to figure out how to be exhausted and pregnant and alone (B deployed A LOT) in a new country. But, it was hard as a momma and perhaps that is why I now cherish the days she has off of school so much? She never cried, she went in confidently, she made friends, she grew stronger and braver, and at the end of the day, so did I. If sending your girls to school is the right option for your family, you will all do just fine. Molly will grow strong in spirit and mind andY OU will be so VERY PROUD of her. Just remember to give her grace at the end of the day. Give her a snack, give her some rest, and give her some free time since she'll likely be tired from school.

  3. Thanks Megan! I totally think she will love kindergarten. She genuinely loves other kids and I can see her loving school. I think maybe I just can't wrap my brain around her being gone all day? Your advice helps a lot.