What's In A Name?

Warning: this blog has the potential to offend. I apologize in advance. Please feel free to start your own blog criticizing my child's name.

People, when did we all lose our minds and decide to name our kids bizarro things? My theory is that the Jennifers and Jessicas of the '80s grew up and decided that we wanted our kids not to be known as "The Blonde Jennifer" or "Kristin with an I" like some of us were throughout elementary school, so we thought of totally unusual things to name our kids. Yesterday I was picking up Captain Destructo from the gym and the woman in front of me said "come here, Meadow, it's time to go." Meadow?! Really?! The woman (who's name is the same as my little chicken, an awesome name if I do say so myself) managed to say this without laughing so I had to give her props for that.

Now I understand giving your kids names that are unusual. The name that we have chosen for a boy is unusual (and I won't say it b/c I don't want the criticism...it's the only name we can agree on. And I've tried about a thousand). But at least it's an actual name. Picking a random noun and making your child go by it for the rest of their lives is no fun. And can we also agree to not invent weird spellings to make a name seem more unusual than it actually is? People always ask me how to spell Captain's name, which is very traditional and common. Let's pretend her name is Mary. Is there any other way? Like with a silent Q at the beginning?

I was a teacher in the ghetto before being a mom so I've seen my fair share of weird names. One year I taught Treshawn, Dashawn, Tanisha, and Keneisha in the same class. My favorite weird name story is a student named Nautica (pronounced Nau-tee-kah, you know, like it's spelled) who had a baby brother named Dalast. Because her mother said it was da last baby she would have. True story.

Gotta go. Da first is waking up from her nap.